sending the Dossier!

So the next step in our process was to send our completed dossier (all 61 pages of it) to our agency. Here's a picture of the wonderful lady at the Secretary of the Commonwealth's office. She's holding up our last document:



These are the three copies of our dossier:


Woo hoo! It is finished!
Then Lucy said "hold it?... cheeeeeese" Too cute. If only she knew this new little one is going to rock her world :)

So, now our agency is reviewing the dossier. They will get back to us if there are any issues. Then they'll send it to the US State Department for Authentication (yes, again) and then they'll send it to the Rwandan Embassy. The next thing we'll hear is that our dossier is on the way to Rwanda! Hooray!

got the last document!

As of saturday's mail, we are now DONE with the paper chasing (or at least until someone tells us otherwise).  Adrianne will be taking the last document to get certified at the Secretary of the Commonwealth tomorrow AM and the dossier should be on the road to DC sometime soon.   Really, really exciting for us wrapping up what has been a long couple of months of documentation tedium...

And on behalf of the other half of hunterandadrianne, we're glad you're here and reading.  We're looking forward to sharing the journey with you. 

questions and answers

Hunter had the good idea to do a list of FAQs regarding our adoption process. Here are some of the questions we usually get asked when we tell people about our journey (and our answers as of today):

Q: Do you know what country you’ll be adopting from?
A: Yes, Rwanda, which is in Eastern Africa. We both visited in 2006 and we cherished our time there. It is one of the most beautiful places on earth...despite the intense poverty experienced by many. I'm sure we'll tell you lots more about what Rwanda is like in the months to come.

Q: Boy or girl?
A: Either.

Q: How old?
A: We’re requesting a child anywhere between newborn and one year younger than Lucy. So, likely he or she will be no older than 12-15 months when they come home (or at least we hope so since neither of us can imagine waiting longer than that for #2!)

Q: How many?
A: One at a time, Adrianne; one at a time.

Q: Will you travel to Rwanda? How many times?
A: If all goes well, we’ll both make one trip to Rwanda to pick up and bring the child home. We’re not really sure how long the trip will be, but we think it will be 2 weeks, give or take.

Q: Will you bring Lucy with you?
A: We're not sure. If the planned trip is longer than 2 weeks then we probably will. If it is more like 7-10 days, we'll probably leave her at home with friends and family.

Q: When do you think you’ll bring the child home?
A: Honestly, it’s all conjecture at this point, but it seems like sometime in late 2009 or early 2010.

Q: Why are you adopting?
A: This is a little more complex and we’ll hopefully spend some time on this blog sharing some of our thoughts on the subject, but the short version is: there’s a kid in Rwanda somewhere, made in God's image just like you and me, who doesn’t have a family to care for them and we want to be their family.

Q: Do you have names picked out?
A: No, not yet. So, bring on the suggestions. Lucy got her name, in part, from a suggestion from a family member, so you never know how your ideas could have an impact.

Q: Will you know anything about the birth parents?
A: Probably not. Most of the children who have been adopted from Rwanda are abandoned because families are so poor they cannot take care of another child.

Q: Will you get a medical report for your child?
A: Yes. All adopted children are given a full medical examination. Before a child will be referred to us, they will be tested for HIV, hepatitis, TB, etc. Most adopted children are developmentally delayed as a result of being institutionalized. Studies say that for every 3 months you're in an orphanage you are developmentally delayed 1 month.

Q: What does the process look like?
A: It is a LONG process filled with lots and lots of paperwork. If you're really interested--and it is totally okay if you're not!--here's a summary of what international adoption requires:

Step 1: Choose an agency who has experience in Rwandese adoptions, apply, get accepted to
their program (done)

Step 2: Sign their adoption agreement and send initial payment. (done)

Step 3: Be assigned a family coordinator who will work with us throughout the adoption process. (done)

Step 4: Simultaneously compile paperwork for the home study and dossier. The dossier is the main adoption packet...made up of 3 lbs of paperwork...that is approved first by the U.S. government and then by the Rwandese government. These documents must be submitted to the homestudy agency before you can begin the in home homestudy process (we're done with all of this):
1. Autobiographies (3 pages for each of us detailing info about our lives)
2. Certified copies of birth/death certificates
3. Certified copy of marriage license
4. Notarized medical forms, with AIDS, TB and Hep bloodwork and clearance
5. State police clearances- Virginia
6. Child Protective Services clearance (Virginia)
7. FBI clearance
8. FBI fingerprints
9. Child Protective Services clearance (North Carolina)
10. Sworn Statement of Affirmation for all adults in household
11. Notarized employment letters for all claimed income
12. Notarized financial statement
13. Notarized copy of most recent federal tax forms (Federal 1040—1st 2 pages)
14. Signed guardianship statement
15. International disclaimer
16. Duty of Candor Form
17. Residential History Form
18. Reading agreement 19. America World Intercountry Placement form
20. 3 Agreements: AWAA, Home Study, Post Placement
21. Recent Pay Stub for Hunter
22. 3 Reference forms

Once you complete all those forms, you have 4 visits with the home study social worker who, during those visits, will spend 5 hours with you discussing your background, your reasons for adoption, your emotions towards the child's birth parents, your parenting style, etc. Our social worker was WONDERFUL. She visited our house twice and we met with her up in DC to sign off on our 10-page homestudy.

Here is a list of items we need to compile for the Rwanda Dossier:

1. Application letter (notarized and certified)
2. Hunter’s birth certificate (certified in Missouri)
3. Adrianne’s birth certificate (certified in Ohio)
4. Our Marriage License (certified in North Carolina)
5. Adrianne’s Medical Form (notarized and certified)
6. Hunter’s Medical Form (notarized and certified)
7. Medical Insurance Copy (notarized copy of an original and certified)
8. Medical Insurance Card Copy (notarized copy of an original and certified)
9. Financial Statement (notarized and certified)
10. Hunter’s W-2 Statement (notarized copy of an original and certified)
11. Adrianne’s Non-employment letter (notarized and certified)
12. Our homestudy (notarized and certified)
13. Adrianne’s declaration of intent (notarized and certified)
14. Hunter’s declaration of intent (notarized and certified)
15. Hunter’s police department record (notarized and certified)
16. Adrianne’s police department record (notarized and certified)
17. I-171 H (notarized copy of an original and certified)
18. Power of Attorney (notarized and certified)
19. Family composition letter (notarized and certified)
20. Agency Post Adoption letter (notarized and certified)
21. Adrianne’s passport (notarized copy of an original and certified)
22. Hunter’s passport (notarized copy of an original and certified)

Step 5: Both of us complete 10 hours of Hague online pre-adoption training (done)

Step 6: Apply for a visa for our baby (I-600 Application to the USCIS) (done)

Step 7: Once our family coordinator approves the home study we submit the final copy to the USCIS. (done)

Step 8: Certify dossier documents based on the state in which they originate. (done)

Step 9: Make 3 full sets of the dossier

Step 10: Send completed dossier to AWAA.

Step 11: AWAA reviews it and sends it to the Rwandese embassy (likely in the next 2 weeks)

Step 12: They write a letter of recommendation and then send it to Rwanda (probably in the next 4 weeks)

Step 13: WAIT FOR WAY TOO LONG!

Step 14: Receive approval by the Ministry of Family and Gender. (We've seen this taking anywhere from 2-5 months)

Step 15: Once we're approved, the caregivers at the home from which we'll adopt will pray and choose a child for us. We'll likely be approved to adopt from Mother Theresa's "Home of Hope" in Kigali, Rwanda. Then our child will go through a bunch of medical tests and then we'll get our referral which will include lots of pictures of our child, their given name, their "story" of why they are orphaned, etc. (that takes somewhere around 4-6 weeks once we receive our approval)

Step 16: Travel and Court. Once we accept our referral, we'll receive our court date in Rwanda, when the child will be legally ours. We'll schedule our travel and GO!

Step 17: COME HOME!!!!!!!

Please pray for us and walk with us on this journey!!!

we're glad you're here!

Well, we should probably start by saying “welcome to our blog!” It seems like there is an enormous amount of (self imposed) pressure regarding a first blog entry. We'll be somewhat relieved when we're done with it. Sorry that this one will be so long, we'll try to keep them shorter in the future!

Lots of friends and family have been asking for updates on our adoption process (thanks for asking and caring!) so we decided we'd set up this blog to let people know how things are going. We'll do our best to make it informative, enjoyable and up-to-date, but don't be surprised (and please forgive us) if you get radio silence more often than not. We hope you'll use the "comment" option at the bottom of each post to let us know what's going on with you!

People affectionately refer to the adoption process as a "paper pregnancy." Since God has blessed me with the opportunity to experience both kinds of pregnancies (though I'm not full term on #2 yet), I thought I'd do a couple of comparisons:

1. Positive pregnancy test & being accepted into an adoption program: When we found out we were pregnant with Lucy, we experienced a TON of emotions simultaneously. We were ecstatic. We were thankful about how quickly it happened but a little scared that we weren't necessarily ready for it to have happened that fast. We were terrified something could go wrong with the pregnancy. We were really naive about what it takes to be a parent. ETC. Most of those emotions were true for us when we were accepted by our agency into their Rwanda program. We were ecstatic, feeling like God had confirmed the decision by opening that door for us so quickly and we were simultaneously scared that maybe we started the process a little too early--maybe we weren't really ready (whatever "ready" means, right?!). We were thankful about how united we were in the decision to adopt. We were a little fearful that we'll end up being denied somewhere in the process. We were fearful maybe we were in over our heads, and we certainly were/are naive about what it takes to do this.

But, overall, we were CONFIDENT that God wanted Lucy for us and we are just as confident God wants this next child for us as well.

2. Second trimester bliss. The "are you sure I'm pregnant--I don't look or feel any different yet" stage of pregnancy is wonderful, but I had a really tough time feeling connected with the growing child inside of me. I didn't feel like she was my kid. I didn't feel like my life was going to radically change. Oh yeah, and I didn't want people to think I was just a little chubby--I wanted them to know I was actually PREGNANT. Similarly, when we first began the adoption process I felt pretty distant from the kid; I wasn't really connecting with them and I didn't feel like they were/are our child. The concept was just too abstract for me. I need something tangible and there isn't a 20-week ultrasound with adoptions. Though we've started praying more regularly for our child and we've started getting the house ready a little bit more, we're still very much in this stage, I think.

3. All the aches, pains and inconveniences of pregnancy...especially towards the end. Pregnancy, though one of the most amazing miracles God has given to me, wasn't exactly comfortable. Here are just a few of the discomforts: morning sickness, frequent/constant? bathroom breaks, hormonal/emotional roller coasters, heart burn, Braxton Hicks (false contractions), inability to sleep, etc. Well, our paper pregnancy has been filled with lots of these inconveniences and discomforts as well, and I know they only get worse towards the end. There are some more physical discomforts, like the 3lbs of paperwork we have to submit. But most of the difficulty really is in the emotional realm. It would be an understatement to say there have been days I've been an emotional mess. I have moments when my whole body aches with longing for our child. I have moments when I feel like I can barely breathe (sound familiar?) thinking about how we'll leave so many other children at the orphanage without a family. Just like in pregnancy there are nights I can't fall asleep, not because I'm physically uncomfortable, but because I know our child has gone through something traumatic and I'm not there to hold them and to tell them I love them. I have days where I feel like a complete failure because I'm taking so long to complete the paperwork. And I know that towards the end of this paper pregnancy, I'm going to be SICK OF WAITING and I'll just want to hold our child. But just like in a normal pregnancy when you're having terrible contractions, we're trying to focus on the incredible fact that a CHILD is coming to us to help us make it through. Even if the labor to get them here is slow and emotionally exhausting, the end result is WORTH it.

Oh yeah, and hopefully I won't yell at Hunter during labor this time.

Okay, well I think I'm running the risk of analogy overkill now, so, I'll stop here for now.

More to come soon!