thinking about what it will be like...

Some days I get so excited to pick up our kid (okay, that's a major understatement. Every day, like 50 times a day I get so excited to pick up our kid.)...but it is a mixed bag. When I'm honest and thinking not just about my joy in getting this kid, I feel really, really sad and scared about what they're about to go through (and what we're about to put them through). I absolutely think having this kiddo join our family is better than having this child raised in an orphanage. From what I hear, the sisters (nuns) who care of our kids do an incredible job with their limited resources (people and otherwise)...but I believe strongly that a family is a better option for children. The nuns feel that way too...they've commented to each of our friends who've adopted from Rwanda to please encourage families to adopt. The need is overwhelming and the option of a family is so much better for these kids.

Anyway, I am obviously so excited to meet our sweet child, to hold him/her, to tell him/her how much I love them. How I've longed to meet them. I can't wait to squeeze him/her super tight every single time I put em down and give em a big smooch on the cheek (the way I still do with Lucy pretty much everytime I put her down). But I'm aware of how shocking this is going to feel for our child. How too soon, too fast it might feel. How foreign and perhaps even a bit inappropriate (to them) it might seem. I just read this creative article about some emotions our child may go through as they leave every single person in the world they know and it made me so sad to know our child is going to go through this trauma. Removing a child from the only world they've ever known (and the only people they've ever known) seems so overwhelming. It almost feels unloving. But, of course, it isn't... it is just a tragically broken world where there aren't perfect, easy solutions. We will likely have to work hard and consistently to help our child trust us, to understand we are their loving parents and not just the next in line to care for them short term. (Just so you know, before you read the article, our child will not have a transition home like is described in the analogy.)

http://voicesofadoption.rainbowkids.com/ExpertArticleDetails.aspx?id=49&title=A Different Perspective

Please pray for our child, even now, that our embraces will feel somehow comfortable, comforting and normal...even though they haven't met us before. That the transition will be smooth--not just for Hunter, Lucy and me--but especially for our child. Pray for their emotional health during the confusion of the first several months. Pray for us, that we'll have the grace we need each day to handle what God brings.

Since I'm apt to comparing adoption to pregnancy...let's remind ourselves that it is pretty traumatizing for a kid to go through the birth canal as well. I mean TRAUMATIZING. I'm just sayin. Hunter, I promise I won't scream as much while laboring #2.