please oh please oh please

Well, we're praying like crazy that this is the week we'll get our referral. Even Lucy asked to pray for her brother-sister multiple times tonight. (Yes, that was actually just a bedtime delay move...not spiritual maturity. I'm not that naive.)

This waiting is so hard. And I'm struggling. I want God to teach me all the lessons He wants to teach me: patience, perseverance, brokeness and trust being high on the list. And I'm SO thankful for the ways God is opening my eyes more to His love as we painfully wait for word from Rwanda.

Either way, I've started praying that our child will be resilient about their adoption. That if/when they think about their circumstances, which they likely won't remember, they'll somehow thank God for allowing them to enter the brokenness of this world, the way He chose to enter into the brokenness, and proclaim God's goodness and the coming of a different, lasting, orphan-less, joy-filled home (the Kingdom of God). I can't and won't speak for our kid, because I haven't gone through what they're going through...but I will pray that God will keep their heart soft towards Him and give him/her a strong sense of identity and faith.

So, instead of spending too much time trying to figure out all these confusing, mysterious things, I'll try to remember that this is a broken, broken world...and that God is going to redeem it. And, all of His children should anticipate participating in the sufferings of Christ...so some of these moments are my family's walk into suffering. Not all by choice (neither of our children are choosing their roles), but we're participating in it together nonetheless and I pray Jesus will strengthen each of us.

Anyway, before I go on too long about the things I'm sorting through, please pray for these kids. That they'll all know God's deep, deep love for them. That they'll have their feet set on a rock, with solid footing of faith and identity for their lives. I don't know how I'm ever going to adequately thank the women caring for our children right now. Can you imagine someone else raising your child in your place? What a vital role! Please pray for them too...that God will give them everything they need to lovingly raise these children. That their food resources will be multiplied to miraculously and nutritiously fill bellies. That their patience will be multiplied as there is never a dull moment with so many kids. That they would have maternal instincts about illnesses and would be able to secure adequate medical treatment. That they would have their knowledge of and love for Jesus increased as they love His children. Pray that the Minister will feel compelled and obliged to approve and send the referrals this week. And pray that all 12 families will receive and pass court dates in November (since courts are closed all of December). Finally, pray that God will continue to show us more about who He is and how He works while we wait on Him.